A government of spinning

IT has been months of embarrassing climb-downs from Uncle Sammy’s government. First, they reversed the decision to kick out all principal secretaries and pay them off. While some principal secretaries were busy packing their Ha re eeng Thaba-Tsekas after the circular from the Public Service Minister another missive came.

This time the government secretary was telling them to unpack their bags and relax.

What triggered the initial decision to send them packing is not clear.

It is however doubtful that the minister could have jumped the gun or misunderstood the orders.

But whatever the reason, the about-turn was the first sign of either overwhelming confusion or the results of a group of people clamouring for a job beyond their expertise.

Muckraker was never under any illusion that this was no fluke but the beginning of the trial-and-error caused by lack of experience in state matters.

It didn’t take long for her to be proven right. Last week a government circular said the Ministry of Health’s workers will not be paid because there are some ghosts among them.

Muckraker started counting hours before another clumsy backflip.

5, 4, 3, 2, 1 and boom! The government said the workers would be paid. And just like that, all was well.

It would have been a perfect somersault if the government had not landed on its head and sprained its neck.

Case closed and the government is massaging its neck for the next somersault.

“Give them a chance,” screams an irritated diehard knee-dip in the Ha-Tsosane dumpsite looking for excuses for the clumsiness.

“They are being sabotaged by the vile and bitter remnants of the old regime,” says another zealot struggling to suppress their frustration.
Amen!

The civil servants who they said were hopelessly incompetent and fantastically corrupt have folded their arms to watch as they trip themselves.

This is the government, not some tender or SMME. It has over 40 000 employees, tens of protocols and dozens of regulations.

They will watch as you get lost in the maze of regulations and laws if you show them contempt. They have the stubbornness of a tired donkey.

If you tell them to jump they don’t ask how high like those in the private sector. They ask “but for the why?”

If you insist they hit you with the “Molao o re…” refrain.

Block them from hiding under the molao rock and they will drag you by the eyebrows to court. Interdict, interdict, order, order and order. Checkmate! Back to square one. Aluta continua!

While you hang your head they are walking with a spring in their step.

It’s a war of attrition. By the time you think you have figured them out, the IEC is registering voters, Motlotlehi is announcing an election date, the silly season of campaign is in full swing and you are looking for new lies to whisper to voters.

Uncle Sammy’s government has been slow to learn that being new is not a qualification and lack of experience is not an advantage.

Just because you are new at something doesn’t mean you can do it better. Muckraker has always known that this reality will humble them because their claim of being better administrators was not based on experience but on observation from a distance. Most ran small things anyway.

They were big fish in small ponds. The government is a big pond with big fish. Jonah might be swallowed.

Watch now as they fumble like football fans who were excoriating players but have now been asked to enter the field of play.

Your brain didn’t have to be larger than the punctuation mark at the end of this sentence to see the fallacy in the campaign claim that good business managers automatically make great government managers.

There is no evidence to support such prattle. Those who believed it know zilch about the complexities of the bureaucracy that chokes the government.

Those driving Uncle Sammy’s government should learn the craft, calm down and think through every decision because their haste is now comical. Next time the neck will break.

Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuu!

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